I’ve been having a strange time coming up with what to write about because I keep changing these days. I’ve enjoyed the process of moving up the emotional scale and the thing is I’ve been changing a lot – very frequently and very quickly.
I’ve noticed that I’m never bored – my parents were never bored and never seemed bored so I never am bored. I don’t remember a time where I was ever bored, except maybe waiting for something and not knowing that there were things I could do in the interim. According to Abraham, we have this vibrational emotional scale which I first read from Ask and It Is Given (a fantastic book), and it basically kind of demonstrates how you can’t jump from depression to joy vibrationally, it’s an incremental increase. What has happened to me over the past month is that I made a really deliberate intention to move up the vibration scale. I noticed that I have really been rocking around irritation and pessimism in the recent past, and now it’s moved up to contentment, skipping boredom, but I suppose sometimes I do feel neutral. It’s fun to see where you are and what you’re “looking for” in terms of feelings to improve where you are.
One fun thing I’ve been running into when listening to Abraham Hicks recently is that it is pointless to “give the background” or the “context” because it’s not where you’re going. That is a huge lesson for me and it’s been so interesting to let go of the context and the attachment to where I’ve been. I’ve been having a lot of fun spending time listening to Abraham, and it’s been reminding me of the time I was in Italy where I surrounded myself with personal development and since I didn’t understand Italian, I had very little distractions. Being in the US and especially having school is a bit less easy, but mastery is about getting it right in all situations at all times, not just when it’s easier (and I’ll have to say, even when I had very little distractions it still wasn’t easy because of my ingrained thinking patterns).
For now, I want to return to gratitude and focus on getting my work done efficiently, but always putting top priority to getting into the vortex as often as I can. It’s kind of looking better and better every day, as in it’s fun to be in that kind of interim before your dreams are realized and you’re no longer ornery and irritated all the time. I’m having flashes of memories of what I thought of Italy before I went there and how fairy-tale my life has demonstrated it to be in the times where I chose to believe in possibility…and I want it for myself all the time, and so I do love where I am and I love that I was irritated and overwhelmed. Hopefully someday I’ll get it right and I won’t require so much negative-feeling contexts in order to experience the alignment of knowing who I really am, and by then…wow, it’s my new fairy tale fantasy 😉 (Italy was a great one too).