Why is personal development not working for me?

I’ve been reading personal development ever since I could read. Ok, maybe a few years after that, but I always loved books and movies that would promise a possibility of a different life through inner change. I am still in love with the possibilities personal development opens us to if we are willing (or perhaps a better word would be eager) to look at the ways in which we can change ourselves, and thus change our lives.

I can’t tell you how many personal development programs I’ve purchased and done online. How many counselors/coaches/therapists I’ve shuffled through. How many books I’ve read and reread, really wanting to improve and up my game so that I could better serve the world (ambitious perhaps, but not delusional!). And throughout the whole journey, no matter where I’ve come to, there is the possibility that I arrive at a time and space where I find myself thinking:

Why is personal development not working for me?

I know in my last blogpost I shared that I really achieved a very pure clarity that allowed me to see everything in my life the way it truly was and not as the illusions that made me suffer. And I also said this:

These systems started to work when I applied them in a certain way.

This quote of “a certain way” comes from The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles. I realized that was what happened as I was writing about what I was doing, and thinking about how it hasn’t really been that way since that experience (as I share on this blogpost, I never seem to get things to work out for me). That certain way I guess could be described as “connecting with my soul,” as my previous blogpost was talking about, but that can be seen as airy fairy and really, what does that even mean if you don’t even believe we have a soul, or don’t know what that means?

Well recently I’ve been humbly inspired to another piece of this “certain way” business that really caught my attention. It came from listening to a couple of interviews and rereading the book of Anita Moorjani, Dying to be Me (which to me is a must read!).

Here’s the idea. Personal development is basically “promising” us that we will live a “happier” (or “more successful” or “more fulfilled”) life as a result of doing what they suggest. While a lot of this information is truly fantastic (and true, and very actionable and real), there is a big pitfall in such a promise. That is that we literally, actually, reality-ly, physically, metaphysically, nonphysically, cannot find ourselves in a space of happiness/success/fulfillment if we are looking for the answer outside of ourselves. And this is the state many people are in when they do come to personal development.

We realize that this whole time we’ve been doing things out of fear of something else, out of avoidance of something, rather than out of true desire. And when we approach personal development in this way, we are signing up for failure, every. single. time. without. fail.

Why?

Well if we accept the law of attraction, we know that you attract that which you fear. Thus, if you’re doing anything for the purpose of avoiding something, you will attract that something you’re avoiding. So if we’re looking at how to become financially successful out of a desperation to avoid being a financial failure, if that is what we are motivated by (this is what I mean by “outside of ourselves”), I personally don’t see how it could, metaphysically/physically/nonphysically speaking, ever work out and have us come out as a financial success. At best, it would be a quick fix or create the longterm struggle, produced purely through action.

If we get on the treadmill to avoid being fat, if we take the job out of fear of not paying the bills, if we marry the person out of fear of never being wanted, if we go to a party out of fear of being rejected, if we think positive to avoid negative manifestations, we will ultimately find ourselves unhappy, even if we are able to keep up with the exterior world. If we apply personal development to avoid being unhappy with ourselves or avoiding a certain situation or circumstance, I personally strongly believe that this is why a lot of personal development “isn’t working.”

Quick story to illustrate the point: I have a set of books called A Bug Free Mind by Andy Shaw. The lessons in this book were absolutely essential to creating my first miracle in relationships. It talks a lot about (ironically) why personal development doesn’t work, focusing mostly on the way our minds are working against us. The first time I read this, it was revelatory to me. My questions were answered through this book, and in that “round of realization and miracles,” it was exactly what I needed. Being in control of my mind was the foundation to creating a relationship I desired.

After my clarifying experience through cleaning my thoughts up, I left that space of pure clarity and I instantly recognized, due to past experience, that I was not in control of my mind – because I had figured this out the first time, and that had been the problem. I was thinking “Oh GOOD, I get to shortcut it this time without going through the worst experiences – let me just get my bum back to cleaning up my thoughts and controlling my mind!” Yet, I went through crappy experiences again. And that wasn’t because of the information (very seldom is it really about the information itself – I won’t say never though because there is some crap out there). It was because I was completely motivated by my fear of wrongthinking, messy thoughts, lack of structured thinking, being out of control of my mind, being controlled by my ego, and living a life I didn’t desire, that I kept reaching for these books and desperately tried applying the lessons! And guess what I got?

(Are you one of these people too?)

Another example is meditation. I see things like this all the time: meditation gives you more time because it relieves your stress and makes you more productive, and you get to connect with answers that you otherwise would spend days figuring out. What is this, the overfunctioning burnt-out workaholic’s special? Where we feed only more of the ego in the promise that we’ll make more things happen and gain more prestige and more money and more more more… (not saying there’s anything wrong with making things happen, prestige, money, or more, but chasing these things certainly doesn’t give us the experience of “having” them!)

IMG_6312

The opposite of this (the certain way!) is to be motivated by desire. This is the complete opposite to doing something to avoid something you don’t want. They may be the same things, for instance, getting married. But one being done out of desire to be expressing life with another vs one being done out of not wanting to feel like an old bag are completely different things!

Reading more and more personal development out of fear of the unhappy life just isn’t going to get you the happy life, as weird and meta as that sounds. Connecting with desire will. Maybe at some point I will pick up the personal development books and programs that do serve me, but it will be after I let myself come from a place of desire rather than avoidance.

Connecting with desire isn’t a difficult thing either; remembering to do so may be, just as creatures of habit, but you instinctively know the difference. A tip is just ask yourself whenever you’re aware of it: am I doing this out of the desire in my heart, or am I just trying to run away from something else?

Always let your heart decide, and get clear on what that means. Trust me, you don’t want to waste your time TRYING SO HARD to APPLY THESE DARNED PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT PRINCIPLES and GOSH DARN IT WHY IS IT NOT WORKING ALREADY?? Yeah, it’s not pretty. I’ll take that emotional craziness for you and encourage you to connect inside starting now, so that you don’t have to do that emotional craziness I did.

And if you’re thinking of applying what I’m writing here out of avoiding not getting what you want in personal development..well just think of what that’s creating!

xxx,

Catt

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My Honest Review: Abraham Hicks Workshop

I just attended an Abraham Hicks workshop recently and felt like I should share what it was like for me, since I always wondered and never really found any interesting reviews prior to attending!

I got a second row seat stage right!

I got a second row seat stage right!

Throughout this whole experience I felt a little anxious and nervous, mostly because I was excited and that made me have ants in my pants (I was anxious and nervous in the eager kind of way), as I had been listening to Abraham recordings on YouTube almost nonstop for an entire year! On top of that I had been reading their books for even longer.

I didn’t read and listen to Abraham because I needed to know what was going on and validate that. I had an experience in 2012 where I trained myself, thought by thought, into a state of pure clarity and all-knowing understanding, and I saw myself and the world as it truly was for a period of time. What I found from listening to Abraham Hicks after was that everything they describe and “tell us we should do” is exactly what I experienced. I didn’t achieve it through following their teachings. I achieved it through thought cleansing, removal of all obstacles and “bugs” (as Andy Shaw would say), and my vision transformed into a state of pure knowing for about a month’s time. The closest I’ve felt the experience I had being described was in Anita Moorjani’s beautiful book, Dying to be Me where she describes her near death experience and what she saw from that perspective. I also found Anita’s book two years after my experience.

AHP Workshop timer

The workshop timer

Going to the workshop was something I had wanted to do for a long time because I had a couple of questions. I was really eager to ask some of my questions.

I arrived and found a great spot next to a few nice people. One thing I felt throughout the workshop was a level of trust I don’t usually have. I trusted leaving my bag on my spot, I trusted everyone would be kind, I trusted everything would work out really well. It felt like there was an understanding that we were all in there as positive, support for each other. And I experienced that in the first moments where I didn’t have the right change for a product I wanted to purchase. The lady next to me gave me the change I was missing – and said “that’s for you!” I was so happy and touched it was like one of those good help-people-out experiences (which in general life I tend to not have). I felt like this place was really cool, everyone at least tried to know and act on what was positive and helpful.

However as this feeling prolonged and grew and the more it stretched out, the stranger it felt. The workshop itself was pretty much as you hear online – Esther introduced herself, she connected to Abraham and began speaking Abraham’s message. They always kind of have a “talk point” – the grid, high-flying disc, upstream or downstream, let go of the oars, path of least resistance, unconditional love, the vortex – the talk points of the workshops lately have been path of least resistance and unconditional love. It was cool to see it happening live and that feeling of “You can’t be sure what’s coming next,” although if you’ve been listening to Abraham for a long time, they kind of give the same message in different ways. Then they get someone in the “hot seat” and answer their questions, have segments of refreshment every hour of talking, then call on more people and do the same. That’s pretty much how the workshop goes, and that was what happened.

In regard to the uncomfortable feeling I was talking about, first of all, it seemed like everyone there had some dramatic story they overcame – as Abraham would say, “dig yourself a hole to climb into and everyone will clap when I climb out.” Left and right hearing people interact with each other, all I heard was “yeah I was having such a difficult time and then this and that happened to me and I found Abraham/angel cards/I got into my vortex and everything’s been like yeah, SO AWESOME. SO GLAD TO BE HERE. ALL IS WELL.” And “well two years ago I had this spiritual experience where these spiritual beings talked to me.” And “I had the worst time for a long time then, I realized it’s all my resistance I just gotta get into my vortex and now everything in my life is so awesome it’s just so so good. My life is so good. So good. I’m SO in the vortex all the time now, THANKS TO ABRAHAM.” – just things of this nature everywhere. I felt uncomfortable because I knew I had a broader perspective experience, but honestly, I would never share it like that. I share it lightly/generally here to contextualize, and I share it to people who seek answers. I never once during that workshop ever shared my experience, and the sharing of these things made it really strange, almost like an attempt to self-validate.

The other thing I noticed was that while Abraham was talking, people all around would be like “MMM.” “Yes.” “Yeah.” But mostly, “Mmm.” Over and over again while Abraham was talking. And it was from this  that I realized what felt so wrong about the workshop: This is what happened when I attended Christian retreats. The pastor would be talking (and I’m not Christian at all), and I’m interested to hear what he has to say, and then it needs to be interrupted by these little sounds all around me going “Mmm.” It was the singly most frustrating and annoying thing for me about attending Christian retreats. It’s as if people need to say Mmm to validate themselves and their own “beliefs” about what they “believe” in (and if you’ve studied a bug free mind, you’ll know how useless/damaging “believing” something is). The other similarity I heard during the workshop was that people would end their interactions with one another with “All is well.” It was the exact same energy as how people in the church ended sentences with “Jesus loves you.” I found these things ironic because a lot of “New Age/New Thought” community individuals condemn organized religions, especially Christianity. True, the new thought community has completely opposite premises, but I found that the energy of group, the energy of inclusive vs exclusive, the energy of us vs them, was exactly the same.

About the workshop, I never got to ask  my questions, and I was disappointed by a couple of people they did choose. I know that I would have felt the same way with what I’ve written above regardless of whether I got chosen or not. I still found the insights Abraham sharing to be wonderful messages, but the way people received them felt uncomfortable and unsettling. As an addendum, Abraham always says your question will be answered whether or not you get called up, well mine weren’t.

At the end of the day, I think what I understood from the workshop was this one really strange idea I did not consider prior to attending. When this guy asked if he could drink poison and have his body convert it to protein if he were in full alignment, Abraham asked him in the state of pure alignment, do you think you would feel inspired to drink poison? And everyone laughed, saying no. I realized by the end of the workshop that in the state of pure alignment, I personally would not be inspired to sign up and attend a workshop. I still love and listen to/read Abraham Hicks, but attending a workshop kind of felt like an older tooth-fairy experience for me. At the end of the day, words don’t teach, only experience does. It’s down to you, and I’m sure Abraham wouldn’t hesitate to endorse that one.

I’m grateful to have the opportunity to attend a workshop in person, and I trust that sharing my experience can help out and give some insight to some people who consider attending Abraham Hicks workshops!

xxx,

Catt

It’s Summer! Time for Fresh Books and Reading Lists!

It’s that time of the year again – summer. Which means people are out enjoying time on the beach and warmer weather to be outside..which means more reading? 🙂 I’d like to think so. I always had to force myself to read no matter what genre, until I discovered personal development (I know). The other kinds of books I loved were those “child/young adult psychology” books that have a fictional story but from the perspective of a very real and relatable person (which would pertain specifically to me I suppose, but I loved reading from all different characters’ perspectives). I wanted to share some of my summer reading books that I completely have not started yet (I have at least 30 I’m in the middle of), and then recommend a few of my top picks if anyone was interested in some books that I loved!

Catt’s Summer Reading List

  1. The Astonishing Power of Emotions (Esther and Jerry Hicks)
    I just love the books of Abraham, Esther, and Jerry. They’re always great reminders and I’ve been reading loads of their books. While they’re all a little similar, the repetition is really helpful for me. I’m really looking forward to solidifying my knowing by reading this book and getting in tune with my emotions!
  2. Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus (John Gray)
    It’s pretty old but it’s a classic isn’t it? I’m also going to be reading David Deida which I have also personally enjoyed immensely, but I’m in the middle of a bunch of those. Relationships take maintenance, but it should be enjoyable maintenance. I’m putting this one in my list of books because I really want to be better at what I know I can do.
  3. Sara Book 2: Solomon’s Fine Featherless Friends (Esther and Jerry Hicks)
    I’ve been wanting to read this book for a while since I enjoyed the first book so much! I loved the first book, so I’m curious to see what the second book is going to be talking about!
  4. Juice Yourself Slim (Jason Vale)
    Since I’ve been juicing for almost two years now, I want to get into this book as well which includes some soups! No time to try making soups like when I have a kitchen in Italy 🙂 I also want to have a fresh perspective on juicing again, which I’m hoping this book will do. It’s also so pretty so I’m excited to read it!
  5. Thoughts Without Cigarettes (Oscar Hijuelos)
    A graduation gift from one of my fondest friends during my college career. I think I’m going to enjoy this one I’m really excited!

 

Catt’s Top Picks

  1. Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It (Kamal Ravikant)
    Can’t do anything without this. I feel disappointed when I see so many of those 1-star comments on amazon because it meant they didn’t get the amazing message of this fantastic book. It was everything I had been asking for. I was in therapy for months asking and checking in on how I could love myself. I would say three to four months later I came across this book and finally made it happen for the first time in this life consciously. I have to be honest it’s been hard to repeat for me recently but I know I’ll be ready when I’m ready. When you’re ready to love yourself and you’ve truly been asking for the sake of your true heart’s desire, this book will break all the barriers. I’ve read this book at least six times (it’s very short).
  2. Sara Book 1: Sara Learns the Secret About the Law of Attraction (Esther and Jerry Hicks)
    I laughed and cried and felt sooo connected when I read this fantastic book. It was written in the kind of child-psychology fiction books I discussed before but it actually teaches you the principles of the Law of Attraction. I love this book so much and hold it very dear to me. It is a beautifully written book and it answered my questions about clarifying the Law of Attraction. I read this book twice already and don’t mind to read it again!
  3. Slim4Life: Freedom From the Food Trap (Jason Vale)
    This book is also on my summer reading list since I only read it once! It is an amazing book, you’ll never look at food the same way again, and it’s not weird or hokey or try this new diet weird crap. It’s really logical, though not all of the arguments are sound (Jason sometimes comes up with some weird arguments and I can’t remember the ones from this book, but Jason, the vegan large land animal argument is not good enough take it out of 5lbs in 5days!), they make you realize that the justification we’ve been having in our heads about food and exercise are certainly not sound either. It’s a whole new approach to looking at food and it changed me forever. It got me serious about juicing! I have to read it again though since I’ve been eating a lot of things I don’t want recently but have been craving. I read this book once only, but I remember how much I enjoyed it.
  4. Conversations with God, Book 1 (Neale Donald Walsch)
    This book really changed everything for me. I always “believed” in the principles it shared before I discovered them. I would argue for the exact arguments God would present to Neale in life in general before I read this book. I was always missing the last bits and pieces though, they never seemed to be expressed properly by me. Until I found this book and read it. It changed me, as I have very little religious/spiritual background aside from self-improvement. I didn’t know what spirituality meant, and I had no concept of God. This book was a major turning point in my life, and it is beautiful. Paradoxes that make complete sense and clarity to the questions I had been asking. Classic. I’ve read this book 5 times already and plan to read it again. I literally could not put the book down in each reread I’ve done. Thank you Neale, thank you!
  5. Just Ask the Universe (Michael Samuels)
    I bought this book for my fiance’ as a present because I enjoyed it so much! It’s a pretty short book and I feel like Michael had a similar experience to many people who write off personal development as airy-fairy woo-woo stuff. I had a lot of similar thoughts as Michael too – just general doubts and skepticism until I experienced something for the first time in my life. Michael writes beautifully and honestly about his experience with the Law of Attraction and how he achieved his dream life with a personal development program by Tony Robbins when he was at his lowest. It’s a truly inspiring read and gets you to start asking! I’ve read this twice so I’d like to read it again also.
  6. A Simple Act of Gratitude (John Kralik)
    Jumping off the last one, I just remembered this beautiful book. I was trying to order it off amazon and I could not find a suitable seller for me. Then I went to the Barnes and Noble and would you guess it was in the only section I look in – the discount book section. Sitting right there, pretty and hardcover. Wow, what an amazing book. Truly, truly inspirational. I started writing my own thank you letters after that although I felt his were always more magical than mine. I personally didn’t get the same experience from writing Thank you notes – I have some weird energy around them even though I did give them a go! 🙂 – but I did go back to my gratitude practices and it allowed me improve my life a lot. If you ever wondered why gratitude even matters and think its just for hippies and ignorant optimists, READ THIS BOOK it will change you. I’ve read this book just once, but once was enough for me..I still feel the goosebumps as I type now when I think of how magical and beautiful the story is.

 

Some other books I’m definitely re-reading or finishing up and highly recommend!

  • Success with a Positive Mental Attitude (Napoleon Hill&W. Clement Stone) – been halfway through this since the beginning of the school year!
  • Creating my Dream Body (Tris Satori) – Just finished reading this fantastic book! It’s the foundations for creating a body you love forever and I am going through it a second time to get all the exercises down!
  • Have the Relationship You Want (Rori Raye) – read this twice already but slip up often on its powerful principles.
  • You Can Heal Your Life (Louise Hay) – I’ve actually been in the middle of this one for a while as well, but I really like it too!
  • CWG Book 2, CWG Book 3, Friendship with God, and Communion with God (Neale Donald Walsch) – beautiful books I’ve read each once and CWG2 twice, could definitely use re-reads!
  • The Power of Now (Eckhart Tolle) – another classic I’ve only read once!
  • Frequency (Penney Pierce) – I have been reading this book for SO long and haven’t yet finished it even though it’s so good!
  • The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things (Carolyn Mackler) – one of the classics for me I absolutely loved and changed my life growing up. I also loved two of her other books, Vegan, Virgin, Valentine and Guyaholic. I’ve read her books so many times and it’s always an adventure.
  • One Square Inch (Claudia Mills) – an amazingly beautiful book..mine is in Taipei unfortunately but it was a gift I received as well and I loved it..heartbreaking but so touching. I am feeling goosebumps remembering it as well 🙂
  • Ask and it is Given and The Law of Attraction (Esther and Jerry Hicks) – classics. I’ve read Ask and It Is Given twice and loved it..I love how there are 22 processes in the book that you can use to help you no matter where you are! And I am enjoying The Law of Attraction right now these days.

There are actually so many more books on my list..I know this is why I don’t finish them often haha but I just love remembering the Truths about who we are! I know there’s something for everyone when we embrace these truths. Luckily I have so much fun and joy reading these things! What books are you reading for the summer?

Happy Reading!

-Catt xxx

Evidence of Appreciation and Positive Energy

I’ve been wanting to write this post since it happened, which now is around a month ago!

The first time I heard about words affecting our wellbeing and physiology was when I was 16 years old. I was an intern at the headquarters of Starbucks on the Operations/Customer Service department in Taiwan. It was the classic “Dr. Masaru Emoto” water crystals thing everyone keeps bringing up as “proof” of the Law of Attraction or whatever they’re trying to prove about energy affecting us.

If you don’t know what it is, briefly, Dr. Masaru Emoto took very pure water from clear springs or double distilled water, froze it, and took pictures of the crystals they formed. He then started exposing them to various things, including words, photographs, and music. The crystals that were formed were different based on what they were exposed to. Here are some of them (you can also go see them on Dr. Masaru Emoto’s Website):
emoto-masuru

I saw an interview of Dr. Masaru Emoto and the interviewer gave an example you could try at home, filling jars with cooked rice and water and taping “love” on one and “hate” on the other and visiting it everyday sending the jars the respective energies (so on the love jar, you tell it how much you love it, the hate one you judge and criticize). I never wanted to try this experiment not because I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t imagine the things growing in those jars and the thought of cleaning it up after made it not worth it for me lol (maybe get my fiance’ to do it? 😀 Honey!!!).

Well one morning I woke up a few days after my monthiversary with my fiance and he sends me gorgeous flowers every month. 🙂 These were the lovely March flowers:

marchflowerswatermarked

I had been practicing myself into a feeling good place especially every morning, as I mentioned in the last blogpost on setting the vibrational tone for your day, and this morning I woke up and started flowing appreciation to one of the daisies. I remember it very clearly, remember exactly which daisy it was, and I definitely “knew” that this “experiment” was going to work because I trust the power of energy and words and etc. I must have sat there in straight appreciation without entertaining anything else for three minutes straight. It was a powerful meditation for me because I was feeling so good after that, and I felt so much love for the beauty of this daisy!

I didn’t do anything special to these flowers, they all got the same amount of water (all the stems were in the water), they sat on my windowsill and had the same amount of sun..besides they’re kind of cut already so they’re just decaying anyways. This is what happened a few weeks later.

15 days later:

marchflowersapril1watermarked

The daisy I flowed appreciation to is thriving while the other roses, carnations, fern, and other daisies are wilting.

18 days later, at noon:

marchflowersapril4watermarked

This is where I was starting to be like “whoa!!” This is so clear!! The other daisies are like so sad and it’s still going well!

Same day (18 days later), in the evening:

marchflowersapril4watermarked2

 

This is a photo of the entire bouquet, the whole vase. The other flowers are clearly not doing as well as the appreciated flower.

marchflowersapril4watermarked4marchflowersapril4watermarked3

And here I took a photo upclose of the other daisies versus the daisy I flowed appreciation to.

I love this stuff! I love how words and emotions affect us and we can even play these energy games like this!

So much fun.

 

The takeaway? Think, Talk, Act only on what you desire and what feels good! Feel good! That is always the bottom line. I loved this “energy experiment” because I didn’t babble about what is right and whether Dr. Masaru Emoto did the “correct” scientific procedures etc, it’s just something I did myself and I know how well it works! It gives me a lot of trust and peace in the Universe and knowing that this is where I want to be.

Happy Appreciating!

-Catt xxx

 

Why Can I Not Set a Goal For Others To Like Me?

“Pay no attention to the peanut gallery. Their compliments will draw you in. And then, their criticism will later kill you.” -Abraham Hicks, August 2012 Alaskan Cruise Workshop

I absolutely love when Abraham uses the term “the peanut gallery.” It just cracks me up every single time. The image I get in my mind is walking through a beautiful white modern museum like the Getty and seeing a piece of work that is like a huge canvas studded with styrofoam peanuts in uniformity and patterns of waves, and several other canvases similarly hung up with peanuts (real, styrofoam, any kind) on them..that’s the peanut gallery I came up with the first time I heard it. The “peanut gallery” for those who don’t listen to Abraham as much as I have, is actually referring to the crowd – or anyone outside of you. Abraham often uses it in ways such as “you kind of have to ignore the peanut gallery” to refer to “not giving a rip of what others think of you.”

I think it’s fair to say that if you’ve been sifting through life (probably mostly modern society, anyone who would read/have access to blogs), you’ve probably been experiencing that uncomfortable gut-punching feeling of the peanut gallery’s disapproval throughout life. I know I certainly have, much more than I would like to, but I’m smiling at that thought now – it’s ok! 🙂 When I first started on my journey learning about the Law of Attraction, it kind of seemed bogus obviously, but also, I wondered, “well if thoughts become things then I just have to think of the guy I am in love with (shallowly but in love with) to fall madly in love with me and then it will happen!” And I knew on a basic level that that was not true, but I always wanted an explanation why. I think I’ve kind of got it down now, and I wish someone had laid it out for me 6 years ago when I started hearing about the Law of Attraction.

Most of the time they say like “well it’s just a rule – you can’t make someone fall in love with you” or “the Universe doesn’t like it when you dictate how; focus only on the end result” (to that I used to think, yeah? I’m not dictating how he will fall in love with me (my looks? my mind? my personality? my good-in-bed-ness? Go for whichever you want!) – just the end result that he will!). The idea of making others approve of you is the same concept – I can just imagine everyone liking me (and in my case I would always want to specify who) and then everyone will!

The situation can seem kind of complicated, and I want to lay my thoughts out here with this – on why setting a goal for others to like you is not a goal and not even something desirable.

Using Abraham’s concepts, life gets you to experience contrast and the contrast gets you to ask what you want and form desire. I used to think “I feel bad when this person disapproves of me, I know what I don’t want – I don’t want to feel cornered and the disapproval of this person. So what I DO want is to feel free by being approved by this person!” This is where we start hiding ourselves and telling lies to forcefully manipulate people see us a certain way when we’re just allowing others to manipulate us (by allowing their opinions to dictate how we behave) – the manipulator and the manipulated are of the same feather.

Well that’s not actually the contrast (not wanting the disapproval thus wanting the approval – this will keep the “I asked and it was not given, LOA doesn’t work” perpetuating over and over again). The contrast is that this person is seeing you in a way that is not the Truth about you, and you are agreeing with them on a level (that’s why we feel the need to defend and justify why we were right) which is why you feel bad.

The contrast really goes like this: “I feel bad when this person disapproves of me – this is something I do not want. What I do want is to not feel insecure when someone disapproves of me because I know so clearly who I am that the approval or disapproval of the peanut gallery doesn’t mean anything.” That is the “goal” I work on moving towards now. It’s not forcing myself to not care what others think – that just means you actually care a lot, but to go inside, go within and get curious about who I really am because clearly the disapproval I feel that is really the disapproval I have of myself is not in the direction of where I’m going and realize that it’s not the Truth, otherwise I wouldn’t feel bad. It takes a while to get there so it’s not like oh okay not the truth ha, I beat it! The willingness to be open to knowing the Truth is what takes me there faster. And I’m a pretty resilient person so I’m sure for some other people it would be even faster than it was for me.

The Truth is you are an amazing, perfect human being. The Truth is you have unique gifts to give to this world because only you have been through your particular perspective, so only you can give that gift you’re here to give. We usually can accept the latter through logic, but the first one is the one where we get hung up on and try to affirm things we don’t really believe in. I would say it takes a bit of a leap of faith to trust that we are truly creators and that nothing is wrong about us (and it was just some plain ol’ conditioning that made us endorse in that idea), but from my own experience, whenever I set the intention to remember this Truth about myself, I am carried to the point where I know of my perfect and things I desire are created seamlessly in my life.

xx,
Catt

The First “Thing” I Consciously But “Undeliberately” Manifested

I’m hoping at this point most people are familiar with The Law of Attraction, but on a day to day basis I actually still run into tons of people who don’t know it never heard of it “the what?”..most people, when I explain it to them, accept it. For me I was like whaaat? But even people who accept it don’t really accept it if they’re not living it. So crash course, Law of Attraction is like attracts like; that which is like itself is drawn unto itself, birds of a feather flock together, the better it gets the better it gets…”Thoughts that are vibrationally similar to one another are drawn magnetically to one another through the powerful Law of Attraction” (Hicks Loc 1793). This law was recently popularized (well…6-8 years ago recent) by the movie “The Secret” produced by Rhonda Byrne and it was sold to look like this was some magic wand we use to manipulate the universe to give us the material objects we want, which is what many people tried and “failed” and thus concluded that there is no such thing. Well, there is, it’s a matter of awareness..but that’s for another day. I wanted to share the first thing I personally manifested – it was not deliberate but it was the first thing I was very aware of and the first conscious “proof” I had of the Law of Attraction from manifesting a material object.

I had just arrived in Italy and I was roaming around Milan on the first day near Naviglio and I saw this store that was closed with mugs that had carp on them, and then a quote in Italian. I understood zero Italian so I didn’t know what the quote said. It looked very zen and pretty, and from that day I decided I wanted to have a mug that had an Italian quote on it, and I wanted to be able to understand it when I got it without using google translate.

Every day after classes I would roam around Milan nearby for at least half an hour. And during this time I would be reminded that I was looking for a mug with a special quote in Italian on it, but I was never attached to finding it right away – there were mugs I could use and I knew that I had three months to find the mug so it was never a pressing issue. But I did spend time thinking about it every day, and I had no resistance on not finding it, nor did I think any limiting thoughts about it.

Literally two weeks after my first thought about the mug when I was roaming around Naviglio that first day, my manifestation showed up as a gift from my host mother. She had done a huge grocery shopping trip and picked me up a buongiorno mug with a quote from Bob Marley on it in Italian, and she said when she saw it she immediately thought of me and bought it for me. I didn’t make the
connection until the next day where I was roaming around after lessons and realized I had received what I was looking for! I was so grateful and happy. It was just a mug but I had never consciously created something in this way before..it was also quite specific so it wasn’t something like “I want to manifest a leaf on the sidewalk,” so I knew for sure as proof that it was something I consciously created.
Catts buongiorno mug

Fantastically, things started happening and manifesting more and more after that..my gratitude and appreciation for Life soared and things were manifesting on demand. That was when I had a very “clean” mind..but really it all starts somewhere.

I encourage people who have never done this kind of stuff before to set an intention to manifest something small like I did that you won’t be attached to (don’t be attached to PROVING the Law of Attraction either). Some people are amazing with it and get it right away. Some people will take a while longer or find inspiration in another post they read or a book…but it’s great to start!

Some guidelines, though they are not necessary, that made this manifestation happen with ease:

  1. I had a very specific “thing” I wanted to manifest and intended it (let the desire out into the ethers!)
  2. I had no resistance to receiving it – I knew I would get it I did not think it would be impossible or anything like that
  3. Every day some of the air time my thoughts had were spent on it because I walked around a lot
  4. I had zero attachment to how it would show up or when it would show up
  5. I had a solid knowing it would show up – certainty of the outcome

Happy Manifesting!
– Catt xxx

References
Abraham, Esther Hicks, and Jerry Hicks. The Law of Attraction: The Basics of the Teachings of Abraham. Carlsbad, CA: Hay House, 2006. Print.